Our Pilgrimage

Every Sunday in the liturgy we pray, "and we too, who are sojourners in this place, keep us in Your faith, and grant us your peace unto the end..." Lately, I've been feeling that "the end" is not as far as we'd like to think. I keep thinking that even if we all lived until the age of 99, it is still such a tiny fraction compared to eternity. So are we really living as pilgrims and strangers on this earth or have we settled here?

This week in our women's Bible Study, as we study the Psalms of Ascent, we study the idea of pilgrimage- what it meant for the Jews in the Old Testament and what it means for Christians today. Our study touched upon a subject that has been coming up (literally) several times a day for the past few months- fellowship in our pilgrimage. When we pray in the liturgy, we say "and WE too who are sojourners..." not, "and I too who am I sojourner". Unfortunately, technology, "busyness", and the American ideal of being self-reliant and self-sufficient has caused many of us to take on this pilgrimage...alone.

Our enemy Satan loves to keep us isolated from one another because he knows there is power in number and united spirits. We had such a deep discussion about how our lives have evolved to be so busy yet so shallow. We partly blamed technology (facebook, texting, and e-mail), and we also blamed ourselves for being sucked in to all of it.

The bottom line is that it is up to us to make a deliberate effort to encourage one another on this brief journey to the Life that is waiting for us. Too many people stop their journey short or are discouraged to even begin because they don't want to be alone. It is true that God sometimes ordains seasons in our life to be alone so that we can deepen our relationship with Him, but there is no excuse for the self-centered lives that we have become slaves to.

These are my very simple and practical solutions for now (and believe me, they will be the most challenging for me!):
1) Stop texting so much and actually pick up your phone to call someone!
2) Invite people over your home...often.
3) Stop using facebook walls to tell your "friends" how much they mean to you or how much you want to see them- call them or tell them in person!!

Modern Day Martyrs

Life is short.

The message plays itself over and over in my head since my dad was taken from us suddenly at the age of 59 just a few months ago. There was no illness and no warning signs.

Life is short.

The message echoes again when my sister and I rummage through 25 years of memories this Christmas when we begin the process of cleaning my dad's house in preparation for it to be sold.

Life is short.


The message now screams after 24 Coptic Christians are massacred on New Year's Eve as a suicide bomber sets off a car bomb just after church services end.

The truth is, besides the safe and comfortable Christian bubble that we live in, many Christians all over the globe are being persecuted for their faith. Just in the past month, violence and discrimination has intensified not only Egypt, but in Iraq and Nigeria as well.

Not only should we as Christians with religious freedom speak and advocate on their behalf, but we should open our ears to the message that the Holy Spirit is trying to tell the Church as a whole- LIFE IS SHORT.

Sometimes we lose the sense of urgency that Christ desires us to live with because we are so comfortable and death seems so far away. Christ warns us of this when He reprimands the man who built bigger barns in order to store more possessions, "But God said to him, 'You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?'" Luke 12:20.

People living in areas of persecution often have a much greater eternal perspective, and do not hold on to their lives as much as those of us who are only living in the here and the now.

I have begun reading several books on heaven and thankfully, God has allowed me to get a small glimpse of eternity...That is something that has helped me keep the message that "Life is Short" playing in my mind. It helps me to live each day as if it were my last...not necessarily in fear, but in appreciation and enjoyment of God's gift and blessings and in hopeful anticipation of the wonderful Life that is to come.

May God protect His Church around the world and may His name be glorified now and always.

Be Still

Be Still (Psalm 46:10)
(c) 2001 Holly L. Schmidtbleicher

"BE STILL..."
BE STILL your anxious thoughts of mind;
BE STILL when answers you fail to find.
BE STILL impatient, questioning heart,
For I've held the answers from the start.

"Be still and KNOW..."
KNOW that every need I will provide;
KNOW that I will never leave your side.
KNOW that your times are in My hands,
As in your life I work to fulfill My plans.

"Be still and know that I AM..."
I AM He who sees your every tear;
I AM He who calms your deepest fear.
I AM He who gives peace within life's storms,
While those tempests I use to strengthen and form.

"Be still and know that I am GOD..."
GOD, who sent My only Son;
GOD Almighty, Omniscient One.
GOD, who loved you enough to die,
So trust Me, my child; stop asking why.

"BE STILL and KNOW that I AM GOD."

This is the desire of my heart...to be still, and to see God working everything out before me. I desire that every step I take and decision I make- big or small- would be directed by His Spirit.

Today I was literally out of breath at one point, my heart beating so fast... just running from one thing to another, and thinking about the things I had to do. I was forced to just sit down and do nothing. I felt like God was telling me, "Slow Down- RELAX!". How can I be still with two young boys? Lord, I know there is a way...please show me.

In Your Presence

I just came back from our women's retreat in Leesburg, Virginia. It was the first time in years I got to get away without the kids for a personal retreat. Our retreat focused on eating the Word of God, receiving Holy Communion, spending time in prayer, and experiencing true fellowship. All of these topics are things I've learned about since I was a child, but as life gets busier and more distracting, my soul feels emptier as I unknowingly neglect feeding myself with these spiritual necessities.

I realized this weekend how much I need God's grace. He is the One who gives us the desire to pray, read His Word, and receive Him, and He is also the one who gives us the strength to do all of it. All of this so we can be in His Presence...the One place where we find fullness of joy. So what's our part? After this weekend, I realized that our part is simply to work on emptying ourselves and our lives so He can have room to come in...so that we can hear Him when we read His word and not have a cluttered mind; so we can really feel the power of His Body and Blood inside of us and not quench its power; so we can feel His presence in our prayers and not be distracted by thinking of what we have to do next; and so we can wait on Him to provide us with true fellowship instead of hurrying to fill up our calenders with events to mask our loneliness.

I'm starting to "clean up". I deleted my Facebook application on my phone (hopefully that lasts!). I am going to resist the urge to busy my days with events for the kids and I. I am going to do all of these things and more, and then I will pray that Your presence finds a place in my heart and in my home.

My Lost Little Lamb

It was a mother's worst nightmare. I lost my baby. It was only for ten minutes, but it was the longest ten minutes of my life, and it taught me several lessons I will never forget.

I was packing the kids into the car as usual. I put Daniel (my oldest) in first, and came back inside to get Timmy (my baby). He wasn't in the usual spot that he is when he's waiting for me to put him in the car, so I thought maybe he had walked upstairs. He's very curious and active so at this point I wasn't worried at all. When I searched the house three times and didn't find him even when I called his name out, I began to panic. I started running back and forth down the street calling his name, but I couldn't hear him. I asked all the neighbors but no one had seen him. At this point, I was crying, out of breath, and begging God to help me. Finally, I heard him crying, but I still couldn't see where he was! My adrenaline was so high at this point, and my thoughts so crazy, that I was ready to barge into my neighbors' homes in case he had been kidnapped. Then, finally, I saw him across the parking lot in a big grass field coming towards me. It seemed as though he had walked out on the other side of the car while I was packing Daniel, and I because he's so short, I couldn't see him. I ran to him as he was running to me open armed. I hugged and kissed him over and over, while tears streamed down my face. He was barefoot and one of his little feet had got caught in something, which is why he was crying. It broke my heart to think that even for just ten minutes, my baby was lost, scared, and hurt.

Those ten minutes shook me more than I've been shaken in a long time. And with the recent drowning death of one of the youth from our church, tragedy was something that was on all of our minds...especially all mothers. That afternoon, I wrote him a letter in his baby book saying how he has been an angel and blessing in our life, even after just 18 months. It also made me realize that life is short, and all that I would want for my two children is that they know and love Jesus. Education, sports, friends, and all the other stuff we worry about for our kids will come- but the most important thing for them is to be a light in this world, reflecting His love and His goodness.

It also made me think of Christ the Good Shepherd, and how He is constantly crying and searching frantically for His lost sheep, just like I was for mine. He not only hears His lost sheep crying (as I did), but He can actually see them stuck in their own pit. I can't fathom that God loves my children more than I do- but He does. So imagine how much more frantic and sad He is when He sees His lost sheep hurting and scared? And the saddest part is that He has His arms wide open, and He desires that we come to Him, but many times we don't. We choose to stay trapped in our misery, either because we are chained to our sin or because we think that He won't want us back. When Timmy came back to me, I didn't yell at him for running away or not wearing his shoes, I didn't even remember any of that. I was just so happy that I had found him. And that's how we should think of our Lord Jesus Christ- the Good Shepherd. He is waiting for us, with open arms to hold us and never let us go. His love is truly unfathomable.

The Spirit Understands!

Yesterday I took my mom to Jireh Cafe, a new Christian bakery/coffee shop in the area. Around 7 years ago, my mom started showing signs of some type of Alzheimer's or Dementia. Now, seven years later, she has full blown frontotemporal dementia (Pick's Disease), leaving her with the inability to speak, comprehend, and function at even a basic level. The disease has completely stolen my mom away from us. Although I don't know why, I trust that God has allowed this to happen for a good reason. She was- and is- one of God's saints. She was an incredible, Godly mother. She now lives with her brother and his wife who are serving her as one would serve Christ (I can do an entire entry on how amazing they are!)- and coincidentally (or not so coincidentally!), they live just 25 minutes from me. I usually take the kids to see her once a week, but this week I went by myself so I could have more quality time with her.

Since she can't speak or comprehend, its hard to think of things to do with her. Usually I take her walking somewhere, because she loves to see people and God's nature. But this week, I tried something different when I took her to Jireh Cafe. We ordered smoothies, and then I started reading aloud to her from a book called, "Heaven Awaits". She was pretty quiet while I was reading, and I knew that she didn't understand but I continued reading because the content was great. And then I read the following passage:

"In England I was told of a lady who had been bedridden for years. She was one of those saints whom God polishes up for the kingdom- for I believe that there are a good many saints in this world whom we never hear about. We never see their names heralded through the press. They live very near the Master, very near heaven."

As soon as I finished those words, she enthusiastically looked up and muttered something that sounded like "yes"! I couldn't believe it, it was as though her spirit woke up and was trying to communicate with me. It reminded me of the verse in 1 Corinthians 2 that says, "For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him?" It was so comforting, I felt like God was telling me, "Yes! That's exactly what I'm doing! Don't worry about her, she is close to Me and close to Heaven".

I smiled that God's spirit spoke to me through my mom who can't talk. The flesh may weaken, but the Spirit is so very much alive :)

Brotherly Love :)